Love vs. Infatuation

I wish everyone knew the difference.  I wish everyone knew the difference before they tell me they love me.

Have i truly "loved" all of my ex boyfriends/ suitors? NO; not all at least now i know that. Though i loved them as a friend.  I'm looking back and our cute stories would convince you that it was love but it wasn't.  We were still so young.  Anyone can have a cute story when you tell it about the first few weeks/months of your "love".  l wish i never got with anyone unless i already knew the difference but i suppose wouldn't know if it wasn't for those relationships.
I wish i could say that the first person i ever had a relationship with was love but it wasn't.  It was peer pressure.
I wish that the person i'm going to marry is going to be my "first love" but maybe he wont be. but he will definitely be my "soul mate" because i mean, we're going to spend the rest of our lives being faithful to each other and being best friends.

So how do you know the difference when it's sometimes hard to tell the difference at all?
i think i can tell. just wont take the time to post it cause i would know how to fully explain all the details.. let's just say; you'll get the feeling and know.


I have learned not to fantasize about me and a significant other's future together past marriage (no matter how much you two think it's going to work out) unless we will be engaged.  Frankly, i'm afraid of the topic.  Don't get me wrong, it's nice to dream of that.. but Fantasizing of the future just distracts from the now. (I also don't want to jinx anything if there is even a chance that a man will be "the one" for me)
     The whole point of a relationship is to get to know each other fully, love, fix the problems of the relationship today, build a strong connection and understanding, be best friends & be there for each other, and most importantly, have fun with each other.  A relationship focuses on the US and not each other individuality. Problems? speak up, talk the whole thing out, everything on your mind, and agree on a compromise.

So for now, i dream of my future by myself with a mystery man. When i dream about it, I am hopeful that it's a certain someone but then i force myself back to the mystery man.

And I HAVE thought about the idea of ending up alone, a long time ago.  &You know what? I am perfectly fine if that happens.  More time for the things i want to do & my hobbies, my friends and family.  I would also adopt a lovely orphan child and save his/her life for the better.
Either way, i'll end up H A P P Y. & boss with my strong, independent self.
Life goes on no matter what happens so might as well make the best out of what you have.